Category: youth

Falling Into Belief 

by The Unconventional Life, posted in Inspiration, Spirituality, Uncategorized, youth

In March last year my staff and I met with the executive team. I was given 12 months notice my job was ending. That day felt like the rescue team had finally found me. I have never had such negative work experiences as my last two jobs. I felt unshackled on this day. Last week it hit me I was almost at the 90 day mark. I began to become afraid and then I remembered.

I had gotten a license plate message a few days before my almost panic attack. Simultaneously I have been ending one job and beginning another as Executive Director of STORY. I never saw myself as a visionary before. I was always the planner. Give me your vision and I will give you the steps and supportive lighting needed to make that dream come to life. I’m good, no great at that. My comfort zone, but am I growing here? Am I challenged here? What began to happen when God made me the visionary?

I was like Gary Coleman lol. “Say what Anna? You mixed up your people! This is the introvert that likes to stay behind the scenes.”

Kathryn tell your story. 

I found myself surrounded by children. Their faces keeping me up at night. I had to find a solution for them. I had to find funding for myself, assistant and intern. Woah! I shared my concerns at a prayer meeting. My brain was not accepting this new role. I wanted to be a part of a community relations team, but I along with the Executive Director of the housing authority had just founded a new organization. The minister wrote a scripture on a piece of paper and brought it over to me. 

Philippians 4:7 – And God’s peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

She simply said, “Kathryn you were made to do this. Confess this over yourself.”

I wanted to protest, but……

And…..

And…

And…

I couldn’t. I couldn’t walk away from these kids that needed someone to be their collective voice. These are the kids that are stereotyped because they live in public housing. These are the kids that show up every day despite the odds. Our goal was to register 25. We currently have 43. I went over the limit. And then….
I told my story just like God asked me to. I had to live in transitional housing with my first son. My life completely fell apart and I was hopeless and tired. I prayed for a free place to live and it showed up. I was given a whole team to help me put my life back together. It took almost two years. I was the one all those years ago that advocated for the homeless.

My story.

We received our first grant from the Cameron Foundation. This Thursday I will receive our second grant from the John Randolph Foundation. No one knew except those very close to me how hard last year was for me personally,  but I tried to remain focused on my work. I am very humbled by the amount of support being given to me.

This month I have been really contemplating situations, habits and people in my life. I’ve always had lingering doubt. I don’t want that anymore. There are several things I don’t want anymore. Lack of belief, fear and anxiety are stumbling blocks I’m hoping to hurdle this year. 

Everything is on the line. It’s coming down to the wire. I’m staring at Goliath in the form of not enough funding. I’m shouting at the mountain to move out of my way. I’m but one person in a universe of many. My hands reach back for theirs and we go forward together.

Please join us.

When All You Have Is Belief

by The Unconventional Life, posted in Faith, Hope, Inspiration, Spirituality, youth

Faith. I think the biblical definition is the substance of things hoped for even if you don’t know how those things will come about. Faith has been one of the hardest struggles of my relationship walk.
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I am fiercely independent and self-reliant. I’ve had to be that way most of my life. Long-term behavioral patterns are very hard to break. That was one reason I chose to stay in therapy over a year during my separation. The day I could look in the mirror and declare myself a whole person whom I liked was amazing. I credit that to me finding peace and joy in some very intense prophetic sessions. People don’t give prophets enough credit they’d rather seek out psychics. I know because this is my spiritual gift. I used to hate it, but I’ve learned to embrace it.

Huge irony that this would be my gift due to my serious struggle with faith. I do pray about my concerns, but often declare God is taking too long to fix things. I tend to roll up my sleeves and try to fix the problem eventually. Most times if not always I make it worse. Then you have to take the same spiritual test over and over due to a failing grade. That’s what happens when God needs you to grow as a person. You find yourself in different situations facing the same personal growth issues. If you’re determined to grow you eventually pass and move on to the next thing.

Six days ago I launched an Indiegogo campaign to raise money for kids in the public housing communities in which I work. This was insane on my part. My team is slammed. The three of us work like an army. Every day I have the responsibility of hundreds of lives resting on my shoulders. At times it’s overwhelming, but I know my job is more of a spiritual assignment.

Many call themselves Christians I guess for the hell of it or because they were born into the faith. It’s not a lifestyle. Yes their faith is kept inside the confines of the church structures. What about helping the poor? Loving the abandoned? Giving hope to those that have very little reason to hope?

For the past few months I’ve watched luxury cars with out of state tags drive in and out of the community I work in. I myself drove up on a drug deal about to go down in front of lots of children playing. I blocked the addict in his parking space by pretending to be meeting with my staff. My heart broke for him. I knew he needed those drugs and it had my stomach in knots. I would likely save all the broken people on the planet if I could. I looked at each child in sadness. This dysfunctional environment is their norm.

In January my seventh grader won a statewide essay contest sponsored by the Virginia Municipal League. I was his editor and I was so proud. The essay reflected on lack of activities for youth and the problems this causes. Na’Seem had too much on his mind to be 12 and it brought everyone to tears during the awards ceremony. It created in some an even greater determination to bring about change.

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Na'Seem with Governor Terry McAuliffe and Mayor Brenda Pelham

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Na'Seem and I at the VML ceremony

And then several of us jumped off the cliff and launched our fundraising campaign. $30,000 in 30 days. Guess whose bright idea it was lol. I think by Wednesday I was questioning why everyone had allowed me to talk them into this. Panic was setting in. You may have read about my struggle with anxiety. Side effect of being a reformed control freak. But seriously how do I raise this much money in a month?
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I found myself unable to sleep one night so I began to pray, then plead, then cry and so on and so forth. Jesus what have I done? I have created an impossible situation, but with good intentions, because you placed me in an environment filled with poverty, lack of education and those depressing statistics Jennifer is always quoting. I can’t raise 30 in 30! I’m so glad I know I’m loved. It caused a shift.

I ignored logic and decided to have insane faith for the first time ever. “God you are not broke. You can do what I can’t and for some reason I’m crazy enough to believe in you right now. Jesus please make it rain.” Yes I used rap lyrics don’t judge my Gen X prayers. One week down and we’ve raised one percent of our goal.

Perhaps raising the money for my youth programs will not be my greatest blessing in all of this. Maybe I finally stumbled across the one needed mustard seed that will move me along on my journey. I will give this campaign all I have, but I also have enough faith in God to know that any miracle will not be the result of my work. I gave this to him in the middle of the night and I haven’t backed out of the deal. Proud moment! It’s not about me, but all about his glory.

To donate visit http://igg.me/at/HopewellStory/x. Miracles happen through ordinary acts of every day people.